Just Say “NO”

Sometimes do you just feel like a wreck? I know I do…I am a people-pleaser with a fear of failure. Eek! Talk about issues!

walking on eggshellsAs you can probably imagine, that means that I always feel like I have to walk on eggshells, accomodating everyone. It’s very hard for me to say “no”, or anything I know will disappoint you.

Today I got completely fed-up with it. Why do I feel like I have to please everyone?

I’m tired of not speaking up for myself. I’m tired of getting annoyed by people “walking all over me,” simply because I LET THEM! And I’m mostly tired of seeking my worth in what others think.

As I was lamenting this today, I got great advice from some older, wiser women:

1. If you don’t think you or your time is valuable, no one else will.

It’s up to you to choose where you will find your worth, and to truly believe you and your time is valuable. If you don’t, who will? You have to be the one to set boundaries.

2. Assertiveness is a muscle that has to be strengthened.

Of course, there are some people who just naturally have dominant, assertive 37CB0NNMNCpersonalities. But for people like me, confidence is not natural, AT ALL!

But that’s okay…I can’t expect assertiveness to simply be there. Just like I can’t expect a 6-pack of abs to just be there on my stomach (unfortunately). It takes practice and work. Every small step I make, every tiny encounter in which I choose to be assertive, will build that muscle.

3. Just Say No!

So basically, I just have to do it. I have to just say no. This is now my homework for the week! I will say no to one person.

say no

All you fellow people-pleasers, try it with me this week! Let’s dare to disappoint.

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3 thoughts on “Just Say “NO”

  1. You have discovered this earlier in life than I did! I have spent half my life attempting to please people. Not possible because they are as fallen as I am. I now realize the only One I should worry about pleasing is God. Praying the Holy Spirit empowers you to say “No” to unimportant things with humility and grace and to say “Yes” with a heart to serve in opportunities that honor Him .

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Pingback: When Awkwardness is the Best Choice | in steps of faith

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